Every Friday I’ll indulge my order-crazed brain in a list of randomness. Welcome to my Friday Fives.

#MARCI is #two!

This blog is now entering the age of meltdowns and defiance, right? Depending on who you ask, those two words might be more appropriate for me than you think! Similar to most parents (of blog or baby), I can’t believe how quickly time passes or how much it’s grown. I’m even more amazed than I was last year! Many a moment from the last 365 days are now documented within its pages. Here’s a recap of the highlights:

In the last year I’ve…

# embraced my inner cowgirl
# met one of my heroes
# screamed my way through Park City
# somehow picked my Top Ten books of all time
# been wonderfully surprised by my BFF and my favorite newlyweds
# fallen in love with homemade ice cream (namely this)
# said goodbye to my favorite bloggers
# survived another season of Div. I football
# returned to my Miami roots with a new job
# endured six months (and counting) of a not-100% puppy
# seen a childhood hero rewarded
# returned to the scene of so many crimes (trip 1, trip 2)
# finally seen Southern Utah
# tried new things
# spent an unforgettable, priceless week in Texas at the farm and in the city
# said goodbye to the funniest
# said goodbye to the sweetest
# slept with strangers at an airport
# celebrated ten years of togetherness with my favorite
# smiled, laughed, ate, and sunblocked my way through Hawaii (link coming soon)
# baked and baked and baked and baked and baked and baked and baked and baked and baked and baked….
# read 38 books
# written 121 posts

It’s been a good year, but it’s also been a hard year. Back-to-back funerals, friends and family struggles, and a puppy who can’t seem to bounce back, among other things, have had me pretty low. My instinct in these moments is to shut down–to throw up my wall and protect myself from as much as possible. And because of that, for most of the last four months, I haven’t wanted to blog at all.

Blogging is about being vulnerable and raw and that’s hard to do. When you’re trying to shut down, the last thing you want to do is open up wider than before. Too many times I’ve had to push myself through a post, big or small, only to wonder “what am I doing and why am I doing it?”

But ultimately, to me, it’s worth it.

And here’s why…

5. For Clarity

I’m a classic over-thinker with a million dreams, worries, lists and ideas swirling through my head at any given moment. Putting a fraction of those thoughts down on paper and on the interwebs gives me a sense of peace and also a source of accountability.

4. To Connect

I will always gravitate towards people who love to read, cook, bake, eat, take pictures, and smother dogs with kisses as much as I do. Having this space brings me closer to them and secures me in my happy place.

3. To Challenge

I’m constantly challenged by this blog and what I want it to be. I’m also challenged, inspired, and humbled by a host of other bloggers who are rockin’ it week in and week out. If I can empower someone, anyone, to try a new dish or read more, then, well…that’s about as good as it gets for me.

2. To Capture

Without this blog I’d never remember which books I’ve read (or when), I’d never remember all of the things we’ve baked (or when), and I know I’d never recall all of the fun Utah moments we have as we explore our newish-to-us state. But, really, my favorite posts to write and reread are those which celebrate and reminisce the lives of those I love. To tell our shared stories. They are at times (most times) brutal to compose, but I’m grateful to capture all seasons of my life and put into words emotions that run deep and strong and threaten to choke with their powerful roots.

1. To Create

Writing is my favorite. It always has been. As a young girl I compiled reports on First Ladies–not for school, but just for me to write about something–someone–interesting. As a textbook middle child, I think I have an innate urgency to tell my side of the story. I need my voice to be heard. And I can think of no better place than this.

Thank you for joining me on this wild ride. I appreciate you hanging on when I’ve been anxious to get off. It’s made all the difference.